how one hard day was redeemed

Untitled It's time for some real talk. I mean, everything I talk about here is real, but some of it is less--shall we say--- happy.

Yesterday was one of my worst days of motherhood yet. It was to be expected, after a weekend of so much fun, that we would need a detox day, but OY. It was a rough one. For all three of them.

The disciplining and time outs.

The repetitive requests.

The arguing.

The lack of self control.

The dirt all over the patio and the crayon all over the chair.

(I had the nerve to make dinner.)

 

I could go on, but let's just say my throat hurts a bit from yelling and there isn't much that pains me more in parenting than Being a Yelling Mom.

It was the kind of day that ended with me trying to salvage things with a special movie in mom's bed since Daddy was leaving for men's group and I was on my own for the night.

That worked for about five minutes.

Untitled

The older two were relaxed and enjoyed it but the peacefulness of this photo didn't last long before Hallee began going crazy all over the bed (see how misleading some photos can be? Real life happens outside of those captured moments, but alas, that's a lesson for another day).

And then came bedtime, which did nothing but leave me in a crying heap on the floor.

After more consequences and more lecturing, the oldest of the offenders was finally ready to apologize. And then came the line that in one instant disintegrated all the frustration and desperation and anger and helplessness.

"I just can't be perfect."

Of course I know that I'm not requiring perfection-- at this point average would be acceptable-- but that's how they see it apparently.

And that's when it hit me again like a ton of bricks: how much I need the gospel in my parenting, my own life, in everything.

A good person leaves an inheritance for their children's children. Proverbs 13:22

For you equipped me with strength for the battle. Psalm 18:39

Because more than obedience or respect or responsibility I want to teach my kids that the gospel is real and it's what we need to get us through and to equip us every day, every moment.

So most of the day may have been crap but none of that mattered when I got to say to her,

"No one can be good without Jesus. But all day long we can ask Him to help us make the good choices, and He is faithful. He is real."

And just like that, a whole day is redeemed by one gospel conversation.

So I sang them the words that I sing so often but that seemed truer that night.

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him,

how I've proved him o'er and o'er, 

Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus,

oh for grace to trust Him more.

 Resources:

Give them Grace: Dazzling Your Kids with the Love of Jesus by Elyse Fitzpatrick & Jessica Thompson~ probably the most important parenting book I've ever read.

The Battle of Bedtime by Mama Knows, Honeychild~ OMGosh, this is such a funny post that reminds us that We Are Not Alone in the bedtime capers. I came across it late last night, a little gift of comedy and common grace.

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Where I find myself these days

My Women's Summer Discipleship group just started up for the season. Our church transitions out of weekly co-ed community groups and into men's and women's groups and all-church beach nights for each week of the summer. It's already my favorite season and this shift in how we do life together with our church family is just the icing on the summer cake. This year, we're reading a book on Biblical womanhood which is redefining for us what that term means and helping us to see ourselves as created in the image of God, uniquely reflecting different characteristics of Him than men were created to do. So far, between that and our inductive Bible studies that we're training our groups in, it's been really rich.. and we've barely just begun.

me

{David took this photo on Mother's Day.}

The question came up in our discussion about where-- other than in Jesus-- we find our worth and value. My first inclination was to give a superficial answer of living up to cultural standards. And while that may be true to some degree, it's incomplete.

The truth is, the deeper I dig in my own heart, the more I see myself finding worth in whether I feel included by my peers.

This effects me in many areas of life, but I feel the rub a lot in blogging. Sometimes I just want to throw in the towel because I don't feel that successful or popular enough (ugh, here I go, back to high school).

Blogging niches feel a little like various in-crowds to me. I don't identify with a super specific niche per se, so I feel a bit like an outsider, standing outside of a variety of circles but not quite included.

Sewing is one of my passions, but I rarely have time to do it, let alone write about it. I'm not a fashion blogger, although I'm interested in really figuring out my personal style. I'm by no means a food blogger but I love to share recipes with you. I don't write exclusively deep thoughts on my faith filled with poetic language and tangible analogies (although I'd love to write like that more often).

writing

I'm trying to be at a place where none of that matters, but it's still hard on some days. The idea of fitting in is a constant struggle that I'm trying to stamp out with truth. I'm trying to see myself as me enough, even if I don't feel green enough, creative enough, deep enough.

I'm reminding myself that God was intentional in crafting my renaissance soul. This is who He made me to be and maybe not fitting into any particular box is a good thing.

And as for writing, the more I write, the more I think I will become who He made me to be as a writer, because I know He's the one who created me with words that spill out of my heart and make their way to my little corner of the internet.

I'm experimenting a bit with my writing and blogging. The times when I can get on my computer and compose tend not to be my most creative, inspired moments (usually that "free" time coincides with my exhausted-and-want-to-veg-out-moments), so I'm going to try going a little old-fashioned. If I write my inspired thoughts down on paper when they come to me, maybe I'll end up publishing a few more blog posts... it's worth a try anyway! ;)

The Gospel Centered Woman~ furthering my understanding of how the Good News applies to daily life {book review}

review of The Gospel Centered Woman I love reviewing fiction because it provides opportunities to discover new authors and enjoy a little literary entertainment. It's not often that I get the chance to a review a book that goes beyond something fun. I'm talking about a book that speaks to my soul in just the right way.

Thank you to Litfuse for providing me with a review copy.

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I first came across Wendy Alsup's blog when I was googling around to see if anyone had read The Explosive Child and reviewed it from a Christian perspective. Wendy had, and it was by her review and experience that I went on to read the book and glean some great common grace from it. From there, I read through more of Wendy's archives and came to see her as a legit gospel partner, and someone who had a lot to teach on the theological front for women.

When I received notice about the opportunity to review Wendy's new book, The Gospel Centered Woman, I jumped at the chance to review a new book that would further my own growth and understanding of what the gospel actually is, and how it applies to me beyond my salvation.

This has been a journey I've been on with my church family over the last couple of years. It's been a period in my walk with the Lord where my eyes have been opened more than ever before to how the gospel can actually speak into and transform our lives.

Wendy's book goes deep into what she refers to as understanding Biblical womanhood through the lens of the gospel. She doesn't mince words, and she speaks to not only wives (as I find some books on Biblical womanhood do) but really has a heart to reach women wherever they find themselves in their walk with the Lord. I've done a variety studies on Biblical womanhood over the years, but this is my first time going through it specifically through the lens of the gospel. I obviously can't imagine a better lens to look through.

Here are a couple of gems I've picked up... I don't want to share too much out of context, but these passages really spoke to me:

The woman bought by Christ who is set up as God's honored daughter with full access to the King of kings has her needs met in Him. God pours into her. God equips her. God satisfies her emotional, spiritual, and physical needs.

We have the hope of God's power to transform us from women who take matters into our own hands out of distrust of God's plan and purposes into women who, in the image of God, help, strengthen, and support in our realm of influence, trusting God with the example He has given us.

This book is a great tool for learning about what the gospel is and how it gives meaning to our lives as women.

More information

The Gospel Centered WomanAbout The Gospel-Center WomanUnderstanding Biblical Womanhood through the Lens of the Gospel Many Christian books written to women claim to present God's good instructions for their lives. Some expound on the value of marriage and children. Many extol the virtues of the Proverbs 31 wife. A good number teach the value of love, submission, and respect in Christian marriages. Though this book deals with these topics, The Gospel-Centered Woman addresses women from an entirely different perspective. The most important part of the Bible's instructions to women center around the gospel. Jesus' life, death, and resurrection brought about a seismic shift in our understanding of Scripture. After His resurrection, His disciples understood words written thousands of years before with a clarity they never had previously. The good news of Christ illuminates all other Scripture, including instructions to women.

WAlsup-128  About Wendy

Wendy Alsup is a wife, mom, and math teacher. She is the author of Practical Theology for Women: How Knowing God Makes a Difference in Our Daily Lives and By His Wounds You are Healed: How the Message of Ephesians Transforms a Woman's Identity.  Find out more about Wendy at www.theologyforwomen.org.